To carry on with my thoughts on I Am….I am through being taken advantage of by my ex-SIL. There is some warped thought patterns this man grew with, one of which is that if a person doesn’t jump when he hollers frog, then the person not jumping doesn’t like him.
Through the years he has been associated with our family…5 years of marriage to my daughter and the following 8 of their divorce I am been blamed for the break up of their marriage because I didn’t like him. I’m to blame that his 13 year old will have nothing to do with him. His lack of fathering, his absence from her life, his always handing her off to his most recent girlfriend had nothing to do with the conclusion she has come to…I don’t like him so i turned her away from him.
Back at Christmas he called from Missoula, WY, wanting us to drive up there and hook to his camper and drag him and it home; a trip which would have cost us close to a thousand dollars. A thousand dollars we didn’t have and even if I had it, I wouldn’t want to spend it on him given he doesn’t have a good track record of paying his debts. But when we said no, he turned around and called my daughter and said he knew I wouldn’t let paw come get him because I didn’t like him.
So Friday when he called and wanted me to buy him a bus ticket home I told him that I had to discuss it with Terry. I told him that should the answer be no, I did not want to hear of him even breathing the thought that I didn’t like him. I told him a number of other things including the fact that when it came to like or dislike, I really didn’t give a hoot; but as a Christian I did love him as God would have me love him—-I wanted what was best for him. I shared that I thought God’s best for him would be to get honest with himself and become a father to the girls rather than a skirt chasing, irresponsible dad.
A few hours later he called back to let me know he might have a sale for his trailer and if he did he would have the money to buy his own ticket home. In the meantime I have noticed he has become ‘friends’ with several new women on Facebook, leaving me to believe that rather than sell his trailer he has found yet another woman or two to enable him in his life style of using and losing.
However, as for me and mine, I am through not speaking my truth to him as kindly as I am capable of doing, but speaking it never the less.